Raine’s story

“Raine is a sloth-loving, bright, positive, fun and cheeky girl – she absolutely loves telling jokes – chicken ones and ‘knock knocks’ are her favourites! 

As a family, we enjoy exploring National Trust places, going on bike rides, and we all love a trip to Hobbycraft for arts and crafts supplies. 

Raine has an older sister, Ember, and they have a close relationship overall. Since Raine’s diagnosis, they have become even closer and have really missed each other during the periods when we have had to spend time apart.

Last year, Raine began experiencing hip pain that continued for around six weeks. At first, we though she had pulled a muscle or it was growing pains, but it didn’t get better and we eventually took Raine to A&E. We were initially told it was irritable hip, but her symptoms continued to get worse and eventually Raine was admitted into hospital while doctors conducted various tests, but the specialists were struggling to understand what was wrong. Initially, they suspected arthritis, before considering other conditions. An ultrasound scan showed a tumour on the adrenal gland above her left kidney and were told the devastating news that Raine had cancer.

Once we received the news that Raine had cancer, we bought a lift-the-flap body book and sat down with the girls to show them where the kidneys are. We explained that Raine had a lump called cancer, and that doctors were going to use very strong medicine to try and make her better. We knew it was important to use the correct terminology, while also being mindful that Ember might hear different things about cancer at school, so we took great care to explain everything in a way that was honest but still child friendly.

We also tried to prepare the girls for some of the big changes they might see in Raine during treatment, including the effects of medication, feeling very tired, losing her hair, and missing school. Throughout it all, we encouraged open conversations where they could ask questions and talk about how they were feeling. Both girls have shown incredible resilience, and I am so proud of them.

Raine’s diagnosis has affected every aspect of our lives. It all felt incredibly surreal – we had been away on holiday at Easter, and everything seemed completely normal, yet by the May half term Raine was in hospital being diagnosed. In some ways, it felt like returning to the Covid-19 period, where isolation and staying away from others suddenly became our new normal.

I am very close to my sister, but we weren’t able to see her because her daughter had just started nursery, and we couldn’t risk Raine picking up any illnesses. Ember also missed playdates, and some friendships have drifted, simply because people often don’t know how to respond when something so life-changing happens. I also had to give up work to care for Raine, which has had a significant impact on our finances.

During Raine’s treatment, we had to spend lengthy periods of time at Southampton Hospital, which could take up to three hours to drive to from where we live. Many of our hospital stays were spent in isolation, meaning we often didn’t see anyone at all.

Because we live so far away from Southampton hospital, we had no one nearby to drop off essential supplies, and even simple things like accessing documents or managing everyday life admin became incredibly difficult. Life outside the hospital continued as normal, but there was no one to share the load with or step in so I could have even five minutes to myself. Occasionally, the nurses or play therapists would sit with Raine for a short while so I could get a cup of tea, which made a huge difference.

Being separated from Ember was incredibly difficult, and finding childcare for her while my husband was working full-time added even more pressure and stress. At one point, when Raine was having her stem cell transplant, we spent five weeks in hospital without seeing Ember at all. That was an enormous amount for her to cope with at such a young age, especially when, before all of this, I had only ever spent one night away from her.

Our rescue dog, Pippa, is a lurcher from Battersea Dogs & Cats Home. We got her just before Ember was born, and although she is now around 10 years old, she is still full of life.

Pippa loves cuddles – she is soothing, gentle, and always there waiting to greet you at the front door. She is our cuddly, crazy, bony teddy bear! There is something incredibly special about the affection animals show; they have a way of bringing you back into the moment and offering comfort without saying a word.

At one point after Raine’s diagnosis, we worried that we might not be able to keep Pippa because of Raine’s lowered immune system, and we were so relieved when we were told that it was OK to keep her. She has been such an important source of comfort and stability for our family. We all love cuddling up with her and simply having to take her out for walks helps give us a sense of routine and normality during such challenging times.

Pippa misses us when we are away in hospital – it is as though we are her little pack. Whenever we start getting our things ready for another hospital stay, she watches us so intently, as if she’s saying, “where do you think you’re going?!”

When we are at Worthing Hospital, two whippet therapy dogs visit the children’s ward once a week. The children absolutely adore them – they instantly brighten the day and help break up what can otherwise be exceptionally long and monotonous periods of time in hospital.

The comfort and joy the dogs bring is incredible to see, and anything that helps make hospitals feel more positive and less frightening for children can only be a good thing.

Amanda, our Family Support Worker from Momentum Children’s Charity, has been amazing. She checks in on us regularly, and sometimes, when we are at Worthing Hospital, she will come and find me just to give me a big hug.

Amanda has also visited us at home and has taken the time to really get to know us as a family. Her support has meant so much to us during such a difficult time.

We had a break at Momentum’s respite cabin at Shorefield Park, which was brilliant. When Raine became unwell, organising trips and holidays became incredibly difficult – there were so many risks and costs to consider, not to mention simply having the mental capacity to plan anything. Having the cabin took away all of that pressure. While we were there, Raine needed a blood test, and because the cabin was conveniently located close to Southampton, we were able to pop into hospital and then head to Paulton’s Park afterwards.

Ember has started having art therapy in Brighton. Amanda from Momentum knows us so well now, she was able to make some good suggestions. Further down the line, we are hoping to get therapy for Raine, my husband and myself. 

Raine’s grandparents have made connections with other grandparents through attending coffee mornings organised by Momentum, and this has really helped them. We simply couldn’t go through this journey without their help and support, so it’s really comforting to know that Momentum is there supporting them too.

Momentum sent the girls decorated pebbles. It sounds like something small, but special things like this when the kids are going through something so traumatic means the world. It is a quiet acknowledgement that they are going through a tricky time, but they are seen and cared for. 

Raine’s school have been fantastic – I couldn’t fault how they have handled everything. When she was off, they made sure there were lots of photos of her displayed in the classroom and continued to include her name in group work, so she still felt part of daily school life. 

Raine’s teacher visited her when she was at Southampton General Hospital and took the time to speak to the rest of the class about Raine losing her hair, so the children were prepared before seeing her again.

Raine has also been able to take the class mascot to hospital appointments and journal her experiences, which her teacher then shared back with the class.

During her treatment, Raine attended the hospital school when she felt well enough, and Young Lives vs Cancer also arranged a tutor to support her with her studies.

Raine is just starting to go back to school, and we are very gradually building up the amount of time she spends there each day. She had completed two terms of Reception before she became unwell and has since ended up spending more time away from school than in it. Her friends have been incredibly supportive and have kept in touch with her throughout her time away, which has meant a great deal.

The support we have had from Momentum has been amazing. They are a charity with experience – they know what you need before you know. A hard journey is made a bit easier because of Momentum.”

Story taken April 2026.